I was feeling grumpy about a minor inconvenience when I heard the tragic news out of Uvalde, Texas. And this on the heels of the horrific hate crime in Buffalo on Saturday... As a mom, I just wanted to pull my babies close and weep for the parents who were learning that they would never get to do that again. As a therapist, I want to have open office hours for all the grief and...
Why Saying “Use Your Words” Isn’t Working…
Find yourself wondering why kids can’t use their words sometimes? This is true of all of us, but especially true for brains that have been impacted by trauma. Here’s an excerpt from Riley the Brave’s “afterword for grown-ups” to help make sense of this complicated topic… The brain has two main operating systems, social-approach/engagement mode (“the upstairs brain”) and defense mode (“the downstairs brain”). At birth, the downstairs brain is the operating system at work....
Enough and Not Enough
Since we are digging in to the world of adoption this month, I want to share a conversation I’ve had with all members of the adoption triad... I’ve seen how powerful it is when adoptive parents in particular can embrace this tension, that you are enough, whole, loved, lovely, capable, and precious.... And yet you can’t be everything that your child by adoption needs. You’re set up for failure if that’s your goal. Your kiddos...